Why we must stay in touch (or why friends don’t let friends make big mistakes)

Friends don't let friends make big mistakes

Friends don't let friends make big mistakes

Would we let a child burn her fingers on the stove because we left her unattended?  Of course not.  When we are caring for a child, we check in periodically to make sure that they are safe.  We also make sure to be nearby to offer our help when needed.

Similarly, we should extend this same level of care and guidance to our clients, family, and friends.  We should stay close to keep them safe and to be of help when they need us.

But our clients, friends and family aren’t children, so what kind of help would they need?

As Real Estate professionals, we have valuable knowledge

In our case, it’s about Real Estate and related fields.  For example, we have contacts to help Cousin Emma with a credit issue;  we have tools to help our best friend calculate whether buying is a better alternative to renting;  and we have the knowledge to help a client find the right home based on the right school for their needs.

Yes, Real Estate is how we make a living, but many of us also believe that we can make a difference and improve someone else’s life one house at a time.

However,  we can’t make a difference if we don’t reach out and offer our help

In order to help, we need to be tuned-in to other people’s lives and we need to be available to lend a hand when the opportunity comes up.  It is our responsibility to stay in touch if we truly care and want to help others.

Recently, I had an unfortunate experience that made me feel abandoned

This experience made me feel lost and wishing that I had gotten some guidance before I made a mistake:  

I was planning a new venture and worked out the details all by myself.  I did some research, and jumped in hoping for the best.   I spent valuable time and money coming up with a solution.  This solution turned out to be “just ok” and not really what I needed, but it was the best that I could do on my own.

Later, I found out that someone very close to me had the knowledge and the tools to help me.  But because we didn’t stay in touch, I didn’t know to ask for help.  And I had wasted valuable time and money. 

At that point, I wished that I had received a little supervision and guidance before I made the mistake.   Most of all, I felt hurt because I really could have used the help, and the lack of guidance was the result of not staying in touch in the first place.

But… could I be doing the same to my friends and family?

This experience opened my eyes and made me realize that I was probably doing the same thing to many friends, family, and clients by not staying in touch.  Was I leaving them out in the cold to figure things out on their own?  Was I allowing them to make mistakes, and to burn their fingers on the stove?   All because I didn’t stay in touch…

Staying in touch is not about selling

Before this experience, I always thought that offering help and Real Estate advice would be annoying to people. I thought that they’d think that I was trying to sell to them. So I stayed away until they came to me.  But I was wrong.  I think that if we have the right intentions, people will appreciate us being in touch and will reach out when they need our help.

Staying in touch is not about selling; it’s about our responsibility to keep our clients, friends, and family safe from making a big mistake.  It’s about caring for them, and being available to help.


  • When we care for a child our job is to keep them safe
  • We should extend the same level of protection toward our clients, family, and friends
  • Because we have specialized Real Estate knowledge, we have a responsibility to guide the people around us and to help them avoid making a big mistake in that area
  • To be able to help, we must stay in touch and be available to lend a hand when required.
  • Staying in touch is not about selling – it’s about caring and being available to help

Next step: Stay in touch

1. Make a point of touching base with clients, friends, and family through phone calls, visits, and hand-written notes.

2. Online, when you make your Facebook and Twitter rounds, keep an eye out for friends and followers who could use your help.  Remember that it’s not about selling to them – it’s about genuinely caring and offering to be there for them.


About Marina Brito

World Traveler Extraordinaire
This entry was posted in Earning Trust. Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to Why we must stay in touch (or why friends don’t let friends make big mistakes)

  1. You’ve got some very valid, wonderful thoughts here. Especially in regards to DOING something about our care for others. You can “say” you love someone multiple times a day, but not really do anything about it; and thus, not truly care. When we put our actions where our mouth is – we can quickly become powerful and caring.
    Christian Hollingsworth recently posted..The Internet Marketing Man- Interview with Sam BeamondMy Profile

  2. I think that feeling, the feeling like you’re over reaching into somebody’s life, is the thing that stops a lot of people helping each other. It’s all in the approach, and the delivery, as you say, Marina. : )
    Neil Smith@Life Insurance New Zealand recently posted..Life Risk and Sovereign 2My Profile

    • Marina Brito says:

      Hi Neil,

      Nice to see you here again!

      I agree with you. I think that it’s a matter of having the right approach and truly wanting to help others. It’s not about helping with a hidden agenda or expecting quid pro quo. We must do it from the heart.

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